Co-creating A New Perspective

I have this victim archetype that I have let consume me ever since I was a child. The “woe is me”, “look what’s happening to me”, “life is a struggle”, “ugh, really life?”. I went around with an energy of wanting people to understand, to “see me” in all of my trials and could not quite get to the point of “look at all the good in my life”, “I am grateful for what I do have”, “let me try to look at this situation differently.” Conversations and updates with friends and family always started with what I perceived to be the detriment of my life. Especially in the last eight years following my divorce.

My hope was that someone would truly understand and resonate what I was going through and someone cast out a rope and rescue me from my perpetual downfall. I was not aware that I needed to rescue myself.

Archetypes came to my attention in one of my intuitive development classes. We studied the book, “Archetype” by Caroline Myss. Of course, victim is not my only archetype, we each have several ones that are present within us. If you get the chance, check it out.

Currently, my life has been shifting in so many ways. Expanding and growing spiritually, mentally and with my life purpose. I am learning to shift to new opportunities to bring me closer to the path my soul has chosen. As with the par in my life, these types of shifts are also paired along with life and its challenges. It has taken awhile, but I have finally acknowledged that these added challenges and experiences are there for me to push through my growth even further. Pushing out my ego cape of what it feels is protection.

It is Spring 2017, and with the blossoming of the flowers, I have a full month of my day job, co-manager at Awakenings Bookstore, teaching classes and private appointments. I will have one day off in the next three weeks, that I am blissfully looking forward to spending with my sweet boy who doesn’t live with me. Because of the work that I do, classes and private appointments are mostly done in the evenings, keeping me in work mode until about 9 – 9:30 pm every night.

If you know me personally, you know I’m not a “working night” person. Nor am I a morning person. Lol!! Being extremely empathic, I love my evening down times journaling, meditating or simply watching Netflix or movies. That is heaven to me!

I had my week mapped out of sleeping in a little, morning walks, meditating, and then catching up on my business work and editing my book this week, then working and teaching at night. Then I received a letter from a maintenance crew for the complex that I live in. They are replacing broken stairs from 8 – 4:30 every day this week. So, if you live upstairs you have to either be out or in your house during this time. As obviously, there will not be stairs for you to walk up and down. I live upstairs.

My victim self popped up and said, “Can you believe this? You’re going to have to get up at 6:30 am, go find somewhere to sit and do your work while you wait for your other work to start. You’ll be out of the house for ten hours every day. And just forget about walking and meditating, cause how are you gonna manage that? And working at a coffee shop where you can have Wi-Fi? You’re such a people watcher, how are you going to remain focused? Of all weeks, why this week? Seriously. I’m just getting into implementing walking again and now I have to stop?”

I have a creative and demanding ego. It’s a good thing I’ve been working so hard on becoming friends with it and allowing in for my Higher Self to bring wisdom and a new perspective to this exhausting way of thinking.

I allowed myself to see that I could still get all of the work done that I had intended. I just wouldn’t be doing it from the comfort of my home – which has its own distractions, including an adorable playful kitten. I can do bookkeeping, work on my email blast, edit my book all by bringing my laptop and connecting to a place that has free Wi-Fi, and printing out my book for easier editing. Spirit began showing me how to get creative with this little challenge with self-love and a vibration of accomplishment.

I have the luxury of living about two miles from Awakenings. We have a powerful soul spa that includes foot bath, Lifestream Generator, Light Table and Bio-Mat, all reasonably priced for a shifting and healing experience. My first morning I used the Lifestream Generator before working on the bookkeeping. This healing modality looks like an old-school projector and emits Radiant Energy and activates cell regeneration. To me, it feels like electricity running through my body. It’s definitely an energy generator, which is exactly what I need to power through this week.

I wasn’t going to let this mild inconvenience stop me from my morning walk. I put on my yoga pants and sweatshirt, packed up my work clothes, computer, work, and pre-made dinner and carried my load – that looked like I was going away for the weekend – to the car. Took my morning walk on my favorite trail behind my house where I got to witness a beautiful duck couple walking across the path. Then I headed down to the store to take advantage of the light table, which is my favorite healing modality! The light bed is embedded with 48 heart shaped vials that contain Holy water, flower and gem essences that work on the chakra system. Setting the intention that I wanted to continue to let go of procrastination, victimhood and surrendering for my highest good, it was heaven. I’m now sitting in a coffee shop, laptop up, writing this blog that will go in my email blast. Working on staying focused, just occasionally peering up to glance at the others who are also working away.

A friend, who is a fellow writer, told me about a local café in Laguna Beach that she has amazing results at. Tomorrow morning, I plan on heading down there to do a little editing on my book, plus the added benefit of soaking in Mama Gaia’s beautiful healing ocean. The following day I will head down to San Clemente for my weekly beach walk with a treasured friend before heading out to Long Beach to teach a class.

Other than a little tired and missing my morning snuggles with my kitty Lennon, being inconvenienced has never looked and felt so good! It’s like I’m on vacation. A new adventure every day paired with a whole lotta self-love!!

I’m so grateful for this new perspective. It’s definitely an eye-opener that there are so many beautiful ways to look at challenging experiences and put a yummy twist on them. My perspective has definitely changed! The next time that you find yourself in a challenging predicament, allow yourself to open up to a new way of thinking, a healthier and fun new perspective that allows for a new adventure for your life!

For more information on the soul spa healing modalities at Awakenings Center for Conscious Living, please visit:

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